Water bottle season

It's Friday evening, 7:45. As our routine usually goes this is about the time E brushes her teeth, picks up her blankie and goes to bed. But I look outside and it's still light out. How in the world will E go to sleep when she doesn't think it's na-night time? The days are getting longer. Spring is finally here.

Luckily E's room has shades and curtains. Her body is definitely ready for bed. I see all the signs for sleep; including a big yawn. So it's a battle with the tooth brush, a frantic search for her blankie and off to bed. She's out like a light by 8:05.


7:45 AM

The first thing I hear before I even realize I am awake is small chitter chatter coming from E's room. I force open my tired eyes, all though this is technically sleeping in for me, and go to get E out of her crib. She's laying out her belly with her arms propping up her head. She's talking to Elmo and Pooh Bear who are sitting across the room. When did she get so big?

I grab her a morning snack and get to work on the kitchen. E is watching The Magic School Bus. R and M are still fast asleep. As I am standing at the sink washing the dishes that wouldn't fit in the dishwasher I realize there are FOUR water bottles sitting on the counters and in the sink. I almost forgot about all these colorful things. Spring is finally here. The days of filling water bottles for soccer games, trips to the park and hours of fun outdoors is here. Cheers to water bottle season.

No sleep no sanity.

Time flew by again today. I didn't realize it was 12:30 until I thought about how hungry I felt. Then, 4:00 arrived in a flash and we closed early at work because the weather was so bad. Taking an hour off the end of the day only made it seem like the day just disappeared. Never the less, I was ready to make the journey to pick up my loves.

I think we've slowly drifted back to sleep patterns we experienced those first couple months with a brand new baby. Even though we did not just bring home a newborn baby. (Note to sister: We are in the same boat when it comes to sleep. Still.) Rushing to bed to maximize the amount of sleep we get, waking up every couple hours, rocking half asleep baby (and yourself) back to sleep, prying your swollen eyelids open in the morning. Yeah, that's us. 

I am ready for E to be back to 100%. I'm noticing that the sneezing, runny nose, water eyes are slowly disappearing one by one. Now if the coughing at night would fade away we'd be much better off.  The waking up four and 5 times a night is really wearing on us and our patience. Someone at work today asked, "Are you tired? You look so tired." Darn. I was feeling more awake this morning than I have in a week. On the bright side, I usually feel wide awake about noon and have much energy to finish my work day.  

To make up for lack of sleep all week I think the Millers will be sleeping in a little extra this weekend. A nap sounds like an excellent idea too. 

Speaking of the weekend. It's FINALLY a M weekend. We haven't seen her in 2 weeks. Yes, 2 weeks. 2 weeks feels like forever. R has some fun stuff planned for her too. I'd like to make time for crafting and hopefully open the sewing machine she got for Christmas. I also have an idea for my next crochet project to look forward too. Weekends are the best! 

I hope everyone is snuggled up someplace warm tonight. 

Keep Loving. 

The longest 2 minutes ever.

I hate to hear Edee cry.

Especially, when she is in her crib, in the dark, all alone. All I can think about is that she is so alone in the dark. I picture her standing up, holding on to the railing of her crib, tears streaming down her face and my heart breaks. Yes, I know, it's for the best and there are a lot more worse things in the world. Those two, very long, minutes seem like an hour. I have to force my self to stay calm and wait for her to settle down and give in to sleep.

This is how our nights have been this week. Edee no longer falls asleep when drinking a bottle. I can tell she is hungry because she still drinks about 6-7 ounces. But, no longer does she nod off and is sound asleep when the bottle is empty. Now, she acts fully energized and ready for more play time. So, we have resorted to kissing her good night and laying her in her crib. The crying doesn't last long at all, but, it feels like too long. Then, all of a sudden..silence. And she's out for the night.

I always go in to check on her and she is usually sound asleep, in some cock-eyed position. Which, makes me want to scoop her up and cradle her to show her I still love her. But, I know better.

I know it's just another stage. I think this stage is probably a good sign too. Soon enough we will be weening her from the bottle and she won't be able to use that as a means of falling asleep. So over all, I think I am okay with this stage.

And I do love my full nights rest.

Keep Loving.

Two Night in a Row!

I know, sister you are probably, most likely, sitting there saying, "I told you so."

My sister advised (many times) that if E slept in her own room she would sleep longer and possibly through the night. She said E knew she was in our room and it was possible that we were all waking each other up at night.

See, we had her crib in our room. Yeah, I know. She's almost a year old and is completely fine to sleep in her bedroom. I don't really think that this is my issue though. The crib was originally put there to make room for Grandma when she came to stay for a while. Then, one thing led to the next and it just seemed easier to go only a couple steps to grab her and breastfeed her in my bed.

Little did I realize it was only a quick fix. I was maybe saving a few winks of sleep but in reality I was still waking up 4-5 times a night to breastfeed; when she really didn't even need to eat and was just looking for nurturing. There for, loosing sleep.

So, I made a honey "dew" list for Ryan and he moved the crib on Sunday.

For the first time, in a long time, Edee slept more than 5 hours. Two nights in a row! Hip Hip HOORAY! Yes, I am shouting at the top of my lungs. Sunday night she fussed at 5:30 AM and when I woke up feeling brand spankin' new I didn't mind waking up to tend to her! She then slept tile 7:30! Then Monday night she only woke up once again and slept til 8 AM!

I feel rejuvenated, happy and awake. I believe Ryan feels the same.

All though, I did have a moment of weakness when climbing into bed that first night; Edee felt so far away, the long awaited move was completely worth it. We are all feeling the benefits already. I hope she continues on this path and will soon sleep through the night.

Crazy, Busy, drive all over God's green Earth day.

Whatever Wacky Wednesday seems to fit perfectly for today. It's usually my crazy, busy, drive all over God's green Earth day but this week Ryan is taking vacation time so their wasn't as much running for me. However, the crazy and busy part still seems to apply. 

As I've said before I love my schedule and my routine. Well, this week is NOT a routine week at all. We started off the week by camping (I'll be sure to write about our fun filled 2 day camp trip) and the rest is history. Maybe we are all stuck in vacation mode, even though not everyone in the house has the week off. 

I can't seem to catch up and get back on track. I'm loving a change of pace but I can't seem to find a spare minute in my day to relax, write or even pee. I've been doing dishes, chasing after Edee, folding the endless truck loads of laundry and, and, and....

Can I pretty please just...sleep?....

On a more positive note:

Maddi is staying with us all week. It has been great so far. She always wants to know: What are we doing today? What is the weather going to be like? What should I wear? She makes her bed every morning and didn't complain once about taking a shower tonight. I'm proud of her good habits and positive attitude. Today we even made a chore list; followed by a wish list. She is saving her money earned for a sewing machine first. I love that she likes to go go go; like her Dad. They both (and Edee) keep me going.

Speaking of go, go, go: Edee is almost walking. She now stands up from a sitting position and then claps. She knows she is doing something good, especially when we all get very excited and clap too. She will also take 2-3 steps before she leans in any random direction. I give her a couple days and watch out world!

This weekend will prove to be another busy couple days. One of Ryan's close friends is getting married and Ryan is a part of the wedding party. Rehearsal dinner, wedding and reception all take place Friday and Saturday. It should be a beautiful occasion. I'm looking forward to seeing Adam marry his sweet fiancé Erica.


Keep your eyes open for camping trip details and photos.
And keep loving.

The Routine

When I posted the other day about lack of sleep and how long its been since I've slept a solid night I really hope I didn't come off as a major complainer. And even if I didn't come off that way I realized I'm not okay with my lack of sleep. So it is time for a change.

First, I'm not a fan of the "Cry it out," method (CIO) at all. I believe if an infant is crying they are trying to tell you something. I also believe in following your child's ques and that a Mother knows her own baby the best. That said, I can tell when Edee is hungry, tired or not feeling well. And I also know when she is just fussing to fuss, which luckily isn't very often. However I do not believe in spoiling my child and not allowing her to cry at all. I do realize crying is healthy.

Instead of the CIO method I've been looking into and following the "No Sleep Solution." It is not a strict system but instead makes many recommendations, which sits well with me because, as we all know, all babies are different. The No Sleep Solution recommended to follow a routine every evening to help your child recognize it is time for sleep. Then when they are crying use a chosen form of comfort to help sooth them to sleep. Ex. Hush them, pat their back, rock them to sleep.

So, after much thought and advice from friends and our pediatrician I've started a routine for Edee. It is no walk in the park my friends. I commend the Moms who have put in the work at an earlier stage. You deserve those quiet hours of relaxing at night. Enjoy them.
 
Our routine of: dinner time a.k.a. finger foods for Edee, 10-15 minutes of play time, bath time, story time ending with the same book each time, then bottle/breastfeeding in the bedroom with lights off is a great routine. Edee is already starting to show signs of calming during story time. If she is still rather active during story time I give her 10 more minutes of playtime as I know falling asleep during breastfeeding will be a struggle.

However, not every night of the same routine elicits the same response from her. Atleast, not yet. A couple of the nights the routine worked wonders. She even slept well through the night and woke up between 8:00 and 8:30 in the morning. Then there are nights when Edee fights to fall asleep and wants to play, play, play that make me want to give up (and scream my head off and stomp my feet and cry.)  These times make me wonder if the routine will ever work. But, advisors say it takes awhile.

For the most part though, I feel good about trying this routine because I know consistancy will go a long way. I don't have the strength to let my child cry it out until she finally passes out from exhaustion either. So, this choice seems more realistic and suitable for us. Also, I feel like I've been doing something wrong or taking her lead shouldn't have lasted as long as it did. I just know we needed a change. 

I think the most difficult part about our new process is sticking to it. I'm not a strict scheduled person so sticking to the game plan is a struggle. However, we've got one week behind us. So, here's to week #2. Sticking with it for one whole week will have to be enough for now. Advice (and prayers) for mama and baby are welcomed and greatly appreciated on this topic.


Keep loving.

Calamity and Heartbreak

Laying on the pullout sofa bad at my parents I watch my husbands chest rise and fall as he steadily inhaled and exhaled. It's 10:00 AM and he still sleeps. But my body won't let me sleep anymore. It's our third morning at my parent's home and my ear is stiff from an overused pillow, my neck and back are kinked and soar. We are ready to be at our apartment in Grand Haven. We are ready for home.

But as I lay here reflecting on the past week and how dark and disasterous it seems I'm not sad or mad. Nor do I look at the future in dispair. Last week Ryan's Great Grandma passed away and a couple days later we lost Maddi's Great Granny to cancer. Both woman were loving, caring and amazing individuals. They both lived lives that anyone that new them would call fulfilling. And all though the ones they left behind know these things it doesn't stop us from wondering and not understanding why they are gone. I can only pray they are in heaven and that family will heal and honor their memories.

Our third calamity came in the way of vehicular misfortune. On the way to Pentwater we found ourselves on the side of the road after the car began chugging and then shut off. A huge dent in the bank account, a few tears on my part (ofcourse), a stressed out husband and two days of waiting we are hoping to be home with enough time for me to go to work today.

Our time here has Ryan and I agree that we could definitely do without the rude awakening my little brother and his three friends gave us at 3 AM this morning (a video game party we were very unaware of), the disagreements between my sisters who are always add odds, the crick in our necks, and the 3 day old socks on our feet. But we can't do without the memories we have made while we've been here.

I have to take note of this much needed time with my parents and Ryan. Enjoying a cup of coffee in the morning and dinner in the evening with them has been enjoyable. I like listening to my dad's never ending stories and words of wisdom from my mom. Her homemade cooking is definitely a plus. We've had fresh baked bread all weekend.

Making peanut butter rice krispy treats that lasted about 5 minutes, hearing my sister Keisha laughing at random weird things, going to trivia night downtown (even though we were late), finding humor in my brothers sarcasm are all things I couldn't live without.

I am so fortunate I still have all these irreplaceable things to be thankful for. It's not every morning I wake up with my husband still by my side. And it's definitely not everyday I can see my parent's faces as we catch up on the latest.

Calamities and heartbreaks are more than just sad speed bumps in my life. They are my wake up calls.

Keep loving. And appreciating what you do have.

KLM